4 Things Introverts Need to Know About Attending a Bellydance Festival
A Festival Survival Guide for Introverted Bellydancers
Many people think I am an extrovert: I gig a lot, and I am often mid long conversation with a lot of folks. On the inside, however, I am a hobbit. Left to my own devices, I would never leave the house. But my passion in life is performance, which means I really do need to leave the house. It’s exhausting, but my love for the dance overrides my desire for elevenses.
Before we go too far, I think it’s important to define introversion. Introversion is not shyness, though the two are often viewed interchangeably. Introversion is the state of simply being energized by being alone, as opposed to social situations. On the other hand, shyness can be defined as being “disposed to avoid a person or thing” or easily frightened (Shy Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster). So while it makes sense that if people exhaust you (introversion), you would be nervous and not want to be around them (shyness), these two are not the same. Simply put, you can be an introvert who is not shy.
Based on a lifetime of being more bold than rational, I am that kind of introvert. I am also an introvert who attended her first major festival (Art of the Belly) and has a few tips to share.
Be prepared
I’m not sure how extroverts go into a situation, but for me I need to have a plan. Having a basic idea what my day will look like allows me to focus on the more tiring social portions of an event. For Art of the Belly, I packed snacks, reviewed the vendor halls, signed up early for anything I could, and even had a hand-written schedule for my day - including exactly what I wanted to buy in the vendors area. I agreed to help a friend with their booth for a bit so I made a schedule that included that time.
Plan breaks
While not everyone can afford a single room, it’s really helpful if you can find a way to have a space that is just yours. My partner was able to make the trip so we were able to get a room to veg out and relax in between events. You do not have to be in the crowd of people all the time. Honestly, your being people-exhausted in a group of people is going to do more damage to your reputation than ducking out for an hour. You deserve that time to recharge.
If you cannot afford a single room, discuss options with your roommate for having time alone. If you are warm-blooded, go outside. If you are outside no one can ask you questions. I also pack headphones for when I need a break and cannot escape. They are very large, very pink, and very visible. That way people will think you can’t hear them if they decide to try to talk to you.
Network early
I admit, this section is almost taken word for word from the book Networking for people who hate Networking: a field guide for introverts, the overwhelmed, and the underconnected but it’s a good book. Post-pandemic, we have more online friendships then before. It’s easy to chat via Messenger, but in-person is a whole different situation. Plan a way to grab coffee with 2-3 people you met online. Make these plans early. That gives you a break from the large room energy, but still gives you the in-person vibes you can only get at festivals. (Low key- always ask me for coffee. I live off caffeine.)
Know your limits and what you need to do to get your money’s worth
We end with one of my more controversial opinions. I know when I get people-exhausted, it can be easy to grab a cocktail or wine to manage the overwhelmed state. Unfortunately, that’s not a great coping device, and doesn’t allow you to stay in control of yourself, your reputation, and your ability to take workshops the next day. I have a two-drink max (but most of the time one drink) for events. I want to be able to be awake and ready to take the classes the next day and also not deal with my over-peopled self saying something I didn’t want to. Everyone is allowed to manage their alcohol intake as they please, but doing this allows me to feel more empowered in the situations I am in. I am worth taking myself to bed early or enjoying a book in the bathtub after a long day of classes plus watching performances.
In all, I had a great time at Art of the Belly. I took some great classes, had an awesome performance, and got to enjoy a 9-hour road trip with my partner. By preparing ahead of time I felt like I was able to relax and enjoy what was going on and make the decisions that felt right for me at the time.
Fellow (not shy) introverts- how do you manage a festival?
Sources:
The power of introverts | Susan Cain | TED - YouTube
This is great; thank you for your work. I evolved from a lifelong INTP to an ENTP following the pandemic (eek!), but for most of my adult life I’ve been a “not-shy introvert.” Thanks for defining that. I totally agree with your advice about balancing having fun, socializing, drinking, etc. with taking care of yourself so you can maximize your investment in the festival by being present for the classes. It’s really helpful to decide in advance what you want out of the experience… then try to keep those goals in mind.